Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Should I hide my pain?

I feel so battered down, as though I should just hide all of my feelings because they aren't the feelings that are expected of me. I'm sorry, I can't control what hurts my feelings, or what triggers my deep sense of loss... I can't magically make the hurt all better... All I want is some support while I'm experiencing those feelings of hurt.... Not to be made to feel as though I need to suppress my feelings.

I guess I've reached the point where I should just pretend that everything is ok because people expect me to be ok now. Maybe I will just bury my pain deep down inside myself because when I reach out for support I'm made to feel as though I'm overreacting. It would probably make other people more comfortable around me if I pretend that everything in my life is perfect and that certain things don't hurt me.

 I just want someone to be there for me when I'm feeling down, even if they don't fully understand... Please, all I ask is just hold my hand and say you're there for me on my journey through grief.

1 comment:

  1. I'll do it. I'm not a grief mother, so there's no way to fully understand, but I know "moving on" is not a real thing and can listen. This reminded me of you: You don't have to pretend to be okay.